


Sweet Nothing

by Cat_Moon



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Angst and Humor, Developing Relationship, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-01-23 05:11:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21314728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cat_Moon/pseuds/Cat_Moon
Summary: Jack finds some unwanted notes... but are they really what they seem? A study of a relationship poised on the edge of more, yet restrained by circumstances.Part Two added on 11/21/19
Relationships: Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones
Comments: 18
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for November Challenge N Bingo card fill: “Notes”, at [](https://fffc.dreamwidth.org/profile)[](https://fffc.dreamwidth.org/)**fffc**

Jack opened the file that was sitting on his desk, grimacing when a slip of paper fell out. Picking it up from the floor, he saw that it was exactly what he'd dreaded.

It was another note.

He'd been finding them in odd places since yesterday. In his desk drawer, coat pocket, even in his shoe! It had to stop. It wasn't fair to let this go on, but it was an awkward conversation he wasn't looking forward to.

Sighing, he tapped his earpiece. “Ianto, can I see you in my office?”

As he waited, Jack folded his hands in front of him and tried to come up with the perfect words to explain why this wasn't acceptable. He had no desire to hurt the man. He had to let him down easy.

When Ianto appeared in the doorway a few minutes later, Jack waved him inside. “Shut the door, will you?”

He was clearly curious but did as requested. “Is there something you need to see me about?”

Jack handed him the note.

Ianto unfolded it and gazed at it almost impassively. Jack envied him his poker face. It was flawless.

“Listen, Ianto... we have a nice thing here, but we both know it's just some fun...” The expression on the other man's gaze remained neutral. “I do care about you, a lot, but this...” he gestured at the (love note) piece of paper. “This isn't what we are. You know that, right?”

“Of course, sir,” Ianto answered stiffly.

“Not that I don't appreciate... I mean, it's nice but...”

“I get it,” Ianto said tightly. “No more notes.”

“I hope this doesn't damage our friendship,” Jack added.

Ianto's eyes widened slightly, but he didn't comment. “If that's all then, I'll go back to work.” Without waiting for an answer, he left the office.

Jack rubbed a hand over his face. Something told him he could've handled it better. He'd have to take Ianto out for a drink after work, try to explain more eloquently. He only hoped he wouldn't lose a lover over this. What they had was good, comfortable and uncomplicated. Maybe he was being selfish, but he valued that and didn't want to lose it.

XXX

When Jack came out of his office later, he found Ianto trying to strangle Owen. Literally. He had to wade in and pull them apart.

“What the hell is going on here?!” he demanded in his best 'boss' voice.

Ianto and Owen stared at each other. Neither answered.

“Somebody better start talking,” he warned.

Ianto's glare won. The old saying, 'if looks could kill,' came to mind.

“Look, Jack, it was just a joke. A bit of fun, yeah?” Owen told him.

“What was a joke?”

“I wrote a bunch of notes for you to find, and made it seem like they came from Teaboy,” he admitted in a rush.

It was Jack's turn to glare at their medic. “It was you.”

“It was a joke.”

“Not funny!” Ianto growled, trying to take a swing at him.

Jack tightened his hold, preventing violence. “Apologize,” he ordered.

For a moment Owen looked like he would refuse, but finally shrugged. “Sorry teaboy.”

“That was so sincere, I'm all choked up,” Ianto spit out scornfully.

“You're an idiot Owen,” Jack barked. “It serves you right if Ianto gives you decaf for the next month.”

“What?!” Owen sputtered.

“At the very least,” Ianto muttered.

“Okay, both of you into your neutral corners. Owen, I _will_ find a way for you to make this up,” he added, angry at Owen himself. Now he would have to find a way to apologize to Ianto himself, and he knew his lover wouldn't make it easy.

XXX

Back in his office again, Jack tossed the most recent note in the garbage, feeling foolish. Here he'd thought Ianto was writing him little affectionate notes, and it was Owen being a prat. As he watched it flutter down into the bin, he realized with a jolt that the emotion swamping him was disappointment.

**end part one**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ianto's side of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank gmariam for this part. I wasn't intending to continue the story until her comments inspired me to give you all a look at Ianto's side of things. I think it answers those questions, and ties up the loose ends nicely.

  
Ianto spent the rest of the day in self-imposed exile down in the lower levels. He left the others on their own for coffee, and no one was foolish enough to bother him. Or so he imagined. Jack had probably warned them off. He wasn't sure whom he was angry with, possibly everyone, including himself, although he had no reason for self-condemnation. Jack should be the one to be embarrassed for jumping to conclusions; Owen should be ashamed of behaving like a schoolyard bully. Ianto was completely innocent in the whole situation. So he told himself. Still, he felt unusually exposed.  
  
No one knew his true feelings, they never had. He was an expert at keeping those locked deep inside. It was just a stupid prank. Owen apparently thought Ianto had some kind of crush on the Captain... Obviously, he'd picked up on something, even though Ianto had been certain they were always circumspect and that no one suspected a thing. He examined his behavior, trying to figure out where he'd slipped up. When and how had he shown too much? It wasn't Owen that bothered him, he could care less what that jerk believed. What worried him was what Jack might be picking up on...  
  
Jack was right. It was an enjoyable pastime. A bit of fun. Yet no matter how much he reminded himself of that, a hidden part of his mind insisted it was more: a way to replace the pain with pleasure, to hold the cold darkness at bay with the warmth of another body. Jack felt the same way, even if he never acknowledged it. They needed each other. He'd seen hints of the man underneath the Captain, Jack had even occasionally admitted things to him. _We're all broken..._ He wanted to believe they were helping each other to heal.  
  
It was good. No one could fake that. They were both getting something they needed out of the situation. He couldn't think beyond that to a future, it would be foolish. And Ianto Jones was no fool.  
  
_Right?_  
  
Eventually, his watch told him the others had likely left for the evening, so he entered the main part of the Hub. He breathed a sigh of relief to find it empty and dark, except for the light in Jack's office. He'd expected that. Bolstering himself against the inevitable, he went to announce his own imminent departure.  
  
Jack was sitting at the desk, two glasses of Scotch in front of him.  
  
He looked up at Ianto's entrance and motioned to the drinks. “Join me?”  
  
Ianto opened his mouth to decline.  
  
“Please.”  
  
The refusal died in his throat at the soft plea. It wasn't a word the Jack used often, and rarely as sincere. Against his better judgment, he nodded and sat down, picking up the glass to give him something to do with his hands. He decided he wasn't about to be the one to make idle conversation, much less broach the subject hanging in the air between them.  
  
Eventually, Jack broke the awkward silence. “By the way, you won't need to do the feeding or clean out the Weevil cages for the next two weeks, Owen will be taking over that job.”  
  
Ianto was surprised but pleased to know Owen was actually being punished for his inappropriate behavior. Still, Jack wasn't going to be forgiven that easily.  
  
“I'm sorry,” Jack blurted as if wanting to get what he had to say out as quickly as possible. “I handled things badly, and I know you have a right to be angry.”  
  
Jack's obvious sincerity and openness were melting Ianto's resolve, but there were a few things that must be said. “You really think that of all of us, _I'd _be the one to act like a primary school student sending juvenile... love notes to my boss?” he let his indignation show.  
  
Jack winced at the reproach. “There's a bit of teenage girl in all of us?” He tried. The joke fell flat when he got no response. “No, you're right. It was stupid of me to not be suspicious.”  
  
“Have I ever given you any reason to believe I have a problem with the...nature of our arrangement?” He was very careful not to show how much he really wanted to know the answer. To know Jack's thoughts.  
  
Jack took a swallow of his liquor, the pause clearly for courage. “About our _arrangement_...”  
  
Ianto pushed down a sense of panic. A self-destructive urge made him continue in the direction the words were clearly headed. “Look, if you're about to say you don't want to--”  
  
“Just listen to me!” Jack cut him off. “This is hard enough as it is.” He waited until Ianto nodded in acquiescence before continuing. “I care about you, a lot, I meant that. It's... good. It would be easy to let it be much more.”  
  
Ianto's heart stuttered slightly at the admission. “But?”  
  
Jack ran a hand over his face. “I can't get involved in a relationship right now. I don't want to lead you on about that. I can't tell you the whole story, but there's something... someone I'm waiting for. I've been waiting a very long time because he has some vital information I need. He'll come back, and when he does...”  
  
“You'll be leaving.”  
  
Jack glanced at him in surprise.  
  
“I clean the Hub. It's hard to miss the full backpack stashed at the ready.” He hadn't made the connection until now though. Maybe he hadn't wanted to.  
  
“You never cease to amaze me, Mr. Jones.”  
  
“What will we do without you, Sir?” he whispered, hoping his attempt to fall back on professional concern wasn't as transparent as it felt. It was one thing to suspect, one could live in denial until faced with the stark truth.  
  
“You'll all do fine,” Jack reassured. “You've been trained by the best,” he bragged with a conciliatory grin. “And if there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that I can count on _you_ to keep everything running smoothly around here until I return.”  
  
Neither of them acknowledged the unspoken _if_ that stood between them.  
  
“I need my answers, Ianto. I can't get on with my life until I find them.”  
  
“I understand.” Did he? He certainly knew what it was to have a compulsion you couldn't abandon, no matter what the cost. To be living a half-life, merely existing while waiting for the real thing to begin. Even sacrificing the present to hold onto the past. Right or wrong, it was Jack's path to follow.  
  
“I wish things could be different,” Jack told him in a quiet voice.  
  
So did Ianto, but he'd promised himself to never again lose sight of reality for fantasy. “One thing I've learned,” he said, downing the last of his drink, “is to make the most of things while you have them.”  
  
He stood up and held his hand out to Jack.  
  


**The end**

11/21/19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this conversation goes a long way toward explaining why Ianto actually seemed to blossom *after* Jack was gone, by implying that he probably felt Jack was counting on him to take care of things, and couldn't let him down.
> 
> Note: The "We're all broken" line comes from the audio-play, "Broken."


End file.
